A second Fake Criterion of mine for the Coen Brothers’ No Country for Old Men
"And then I woke up…"
A Fake Criterion I made for Tomas Alfredson’s harrowing yet outstanding film Let the Right One In.
"Is there something in the way?"
Jackie Brown (1997) by Quentin Tarantino
So that’s what Samuel L. Jackson would look like with long hair.
"Half a million dollars will always be missed."
Directed by Terry Gilliam
"It’s your daddy’s fault you were the way you were, not mine."
My Fake Criterion for Alfred Hitchcock’s masterpiece Psycho
"We all go a little mad sometimes. Haven’t you?"
Criterion Cover for William Friedkin’s “The Exorcist”
"Is there someone inside you?"
Fake criterion for michelangelo antonioni’s BLOW-UP (1966)
"Nothing like a little disaster for sorting things out."
Death Wish (1974)
"I’ll bet muggings are down, and they’re afraid to tell us."
"We met at the movies once."
"I’m sure it was magical."
Rochelle, Rochelle From Seinfeld
If I’m going to make a fake movie, it’s going to be a fake hit.
"If we wanted applause, we would have joined the circus."
The Trouble with Harry (1955, Dir. Alfred Hitchcock)
Fake Criterion Cover
"How old do you think I am, young man?"
Dude hangs dong.
"Hi, I’m your new captain. Hang on!"
Vacation in Hell
"Lewis, don’t play games with these people."